PretendGirl · Traveling from San Francisco, California

QN5 Baking Update: Natti fail edition

As I mentioned in my previous post, it’s always an interesting challenge to provide baked goods when I’m traveling for a show. On this occasion I made two different types of chocolate covered treats for the performers, and flew them with me to New York. This was the first mistake. I placed the box next to the air conditioner in my hotel (No fridge! I didn’t realize how cheap I was) and by Friday they were on the verge of melting. While carrying them to the show, we were met with a storm fit for the movies (think: clap of thunder, immediate sideways rainstorm). The cardboard box housing my treats was starting to warp.

We made it into a subway station, took a transfer, found a CVS, and purchased some totally stylish ponchos. If it weren’t raining so hard, I’d have a picture of myself pouting, with a crumbling box of chocolate under my poncho.

Once we made it to the venue, I was denied entrance. Last year, Highline let Mrs. Deff retrieve the box and take it straight to the backstage area. This year they were far less accommodating. Rather then throw them out, I started offering them to people outside the venue, which prompted Ianism to ask, “Are you PretendGirl?” But of course.

I couldn’t bear to trash them, so I asked the bouncers if they wanted them. In what I considered to be a spectacularly shitty move at the time, they said sure. So they won’t let me take a tiny box of chocolate bars up to the artists but they’ll claim them for themselves? Classy. I set them inside the door. After a couple of failed attempts by various QN5 members to retrieve them, I took to offering them to those taking smoke breaks outside.

Much to my surprise, by the end of the night the box was still there and still full when the venue started to clear out and the artists began to exit. In a move entirely influenced by Corona, I decided that the person I’d entrust with sharing my goods was Natti. Deep down I knew as I handed off the box that no other QN5 artists would see them.

I got confirmation the next day at the after party that Natti shared them with no one.

But I digress. On a totally unrelated note, look for me at the next Megashow, where I plan on delivering a small box of “Merch” directly to the friendly faces at the merch table.